Years ago, a monumental race was held. This was back in the time of Old Army. In fact, this was so long ago, that New Army back then is what we call Old Army, today.
This race, and races like it, had been won before. Usually, there’s no winner, but in this case, there was a winner. Sometimes, everyone that runs is considered a winner. Like a typical marathon, if you finish, you consider yourself a winner unless you are from Kenya. Our race had a winner.
So, the race started. Actually, a few of the participants took off a little early, but when the signal came, everyone else began running. This was a life or death race. Our hero, Michael, quickly jumped into the first pack and stayed with the leaders. They all looked over their shoulders and saw a second group coming behind them. The second group didn’t seem to be moving as fast, but they were bigger, built like thoroughbreds, and they’d surely overtake the leaders eventually.
As the leaders raced on, hundreds started dropping out of the race. Some seemed to just die right then. Others veered off target and took cigarette breaks, never to race again. Some seemed to get confused and began giving up ground instead of running upfield. Some just stopped and said, “Hey, something is wrong. It’s better if I don’t finish this race.” Others simply got lost.
But Michael kept on running. His will to win was unmistakable. His desire to reach the finish line was obvious as he broke into the lead. The thoroughbreds were gaining on him, although it seemed most of those had also broken down or quit running.
Up ahead, Michael saw the finish line. It was actually a wall he had to crash through to win the race. He reached the wall first and crashed into it with all his might. He expected to be like John Madden and just crash through before talking about something being less filling, but he simply bounced back. In the seconds that followed, hundreds of his fellow racers also crashed into the wall and bounced off. Michael was frustrated but would not give up. He mustered up all his energy and crashed into that wall again and again. Soon, there were just two racers left, Michael and Zorro. They rose and fought the wall thirty-seven times, and everyone agreed that Michael fought the best.
Then, the screams of Zorro could be heard as our hero Michael crashed through the wall and won the race. Once he was on the other side of the wall, he yelled “Show me!” and the wall magically repaired itself to the point where it was impenetrable.
This was the time before Roe vs Wade, and Mrs. Sherman didn’t know any partial doctors turning Apples into cider, so Mike Sherman was born about nine and a half months later. He’d already overcome so much; he’d defeated Zorro and metamorphisized himself into a plump baby. The challenges awaiting him at Texas A&M are miniscule compared to what he has already accomplished. He’s not a quitter, and he will help the Texas Aggies bust through that wall.
Gig ‘em, Coach Sherman, our Michael, our TANK