Deathburger Fires Back

Mike Leach knows he’s stuck in Lubbock. He looks around Lubbock and sees dust storms and sleet and stupid people. He looks around in College Station and sees well groomed intelligent people with loyal hearts. He looks at his record setting quarterback and sees an imbecile that broke a bunch of records and flipped off his own fans. He looks at Stephen McGee and sees a dude that transformed himself into a fullback because his team had no defense, and Champ McGee never complained.

Leach realizes his only escape is through the bottle, but sometimes he gets online after a few. LOL, we’ve all done that, but Leach’s insults are sad. I almost feel sorry for him. He’s a bad man on a downward spiral. He’s smart enough to realize his and his people’s shortcomings.

Leach is in a bad way right now. His best player ever might be on Cleveland’s practice squad.

Yes, Graham Harrell was a system guy.

A system guy.

Welcome to the real world, Graham. I ordered my pizza with mushrooms. Take this back to Domino’s and get me another one.

If Graham Harrell had gone to A&M and been a backup to Stephen McGee and Jerrod Johnson for his entire college career, he would have a better chance to make it in the NFL than he does now. That’s a fact.

Graham Harrell flipped off the Tech student section during a game. Obviously, he wasn’t in Lubbock because he liked the school or the people. Certainly he didn’t go for the education. Hell, the school is not even accredited. He wanted to go to the league. Now he knows he was duped. There’s no way he could get to the league from Tech.

Leach is trying to save his recruiting class by insinuating that the entire NFL is stupid. Wrong, Mr. Leach.

It’s hard to predict the future, but I think we all have a pretty good idea what will happen to Graham Harrell.

After realizing that he can’t throw five yard crossing routes 90% of the time in the NFL, Graham will go back to Lubbock to finish his degree. Once he gets that degree, which is more worthless than those online diplomas you can buy because at least those online diplomas are from accredited institutions, Graham will have to move back in with Mommy and Daddy.

He’ll get a job at the local gym so he can work out for free. He’ll start telling everyone that he has some interest from the league. He’ll drink a lot. He’ll start to get a little fatter. His mom and dad will start to get concerned, but they won’t say anything because of his fragile psyche.

After it’s clear to those around him that he has absolutely zero shot of ever throwing a football in a real game again, he’ll begin to tell people he’s considering trying out for one of the regional golf tours. He’ll begin wearing a Titleist cap to hide his receding hairline. He’ll let his hair get long in the back because he thinks it looks cool like that with his Titleiest cap on. He’ll tell everyone he “shot a 69 this morning” at some low rent muni. He’ll giggle a little quietly to himself after he says 69. People will look at him like he’s pathetic. He’ll spend the rest of the day in the bar.

After a few years, no one will really remember him anymore. Tech students are too stupid to remember anything for more than a few years. Mike Leach will either be run out of Lubbock or will take a job in the next version of the WFL or XFL or whatever. Pretty soon, the only people that remember him will be Aggies, and of course Aggies don’t really care for him too much. His moral values are below ours.

By this time, his parents will die. He’s already run through most of their money on hair dye and designer drugs. He’s pretty much reached bottom, but since he went to Tech, he’s too damned stupid to realize what a worthless piece of excrement he is. He’s lost his job at the gym and now spends some time at a local bar in Lubock where he’s known as “that stupid old guy that buys drinks for everyone”.

When he finally dies, no one cares enough to write an obituary.

What a waste of a life. He should’ve gone to TCU.

Okay, Mr. Leach, it’s your turn. We can do this all summer.

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24 comments on “Deathburger Fires Back

  1. I like what happens at the 3:13 mark in the video :]

    Looking forward to the game this season as always; this only makes the game more fun.

  2. Do you know how to spell and put good sentences together. Get over it no one cares about two football programs which are the equivalent of division II football. By the way Tech is actually the 2nd or 3rd best team in the big 12. Yall would be the ones on downward spiral. Maybe you should worry about competeing with Baylor or Iowa State. Oh yeah 2 more wins and that school up in lubbock will be tied in overall record. When a school has beat yall by more than double (Texas 74 ags 36). That would be like Texas saying they have rivalry with SMU or Baylor. College station is not any better of a place than lubbock. The dixie chicken, does not make your city any better. So the moral of this is if you haven’t figured out by now, NO ONE CARES!!!

  3. “Do you know how to spell and put good sentences together. Yall would be the ones on downward spiral. Maybe you should worry about competeing with Baylor or Iowa State.”

    John, you obviously are an expert at spelling, grammar and sentence structure.
    You should lay off Leach’s bottle while you are typing.

    Randy, maybe so but not as dumb as Leach.

  4. “Tech students are too stupid to remember anything for more than a few years.”

    In that case: Texas A&M has never beaten Texas Tech.

  5. For the record, I was against allowing both Houston and Tech in the SWC. That was the beginning of the end for the storied league.

  6. Tech is accredited by the way. Also i love how all Aggies forget Tech had 3 guy get drafted before Aggie Jesus. Everyone knows Graham was a system guy. Again, congrats on your QB who did nothing in college get drafted in the middle of the draft. I would rather my QB do something for me in college then get drafted in a late round.

  7. Couple things I wanna bring to your attention:

    1) We are fully reaccredited and the only reason we had that one was a paperwork problem. They didn’t cross the t or dot the i. For someone so incredibly intelligent as you try to make yourself sound, you sure don’t know how to use something as simple as Google

    2)McGee turned himself into a fullback because A&M had no defense….What have you been smoking? How would him being a fullback have anything to do with the defense? You realize a fullback blocks right and carries the ball maybe once a game….except for the Hamburgler but anyone that big needs to get the ball to run that belly fat off

    3) For calling us stupid and saying we forget thing, you Aggies sure do keep forgetting how we’ve beaten you 10 out of the last 13 years or is it 11 out of 14 now? Hmmmm….interesting trend there. And don’t get me started on how you have to practice your freaking cheers? I mean, how hard is it? You forget who your playing so you have to have a pow-wow around a campfire and figure it out?

    4) And your fanbase calls Red Raiders classless? I’ve seen roadkill with more class than you

    All that being said, have a nice day because you certainly haven’t raised my opinion of A&M in the least (sorry to all Aggies who are actually classy and stand-up citizens but all this guy speaks is plain drivel)

  8. Aggot calling other students “stupid”..how rich, coming from the Joke school of the state…aggots are the epitome of stupid and ignorant. BTW, I’ll wait while you try to look that one up in the dictionary, aggot.

  9. poor little obsessed aggy trash.

    moral victory #3,175 for the also-rans down in college station.

    good luck with baylor this year.

  10. Why all the hate? This is between me and Mike Leach, and he started it. If he can attack my quarterback, I can attack his. Eye for an eye.

  11. I love this and I am a huge Tech fan. I mean, just feel the hate. It is great. I can deal with all the pizza delivery, washed up drunk, etc.. put downs as to make those comments shows just how far of a stretch the author has gone to put his hatred of all things being Tech on display. I mean I am truly flattered as a Tech fan that the author would spend even 10 minutes to come up with this stuff because regardless of the content you can read between the lines and see his hate and that really makes me feel good.

    I think I am going to have to rank this in the top 3 of things I enjoy readinng about A&M.

    1) This article and those like it.
    2) Reading Texags.com after they lose to Tech
    3) Reading Texags.com after they lose to Arkansas State (the absolute meltdowns are just must read)

  12. Wow. Aggies really have inferiority issues. Let’s see if this helps.

    Dear Aggies:

    We apologize for making fun of you in high school but, in our defense, nerd angst is really hilarious. After you leave ATM for the real world, we promise to laugh at your awkward social skills and lack of physical attractiveness only behind your backs, never to your faces. There. All better.

    The Cool Kids/Red Raiders

  13. That was the most uneducated and misinformed article I have ever read, in fact I am now dumber from reading that. Get some new material and information that you didn’t read on a message board somewhere, then you might have a little bit of credibility.

  14. On May 1, 2009 at 11:19 am Blake Said:
    “That was the most uneducated and misinformed article I have ever read, in fact I am now dumber from reading that.”

    That’s amazing, Blake. I didn’t think anyone from Tech could possibly get any dumber.

  15. Credibility???? Really????

    Leach is the one with the credibility issues.

    I am starting to wonder about the quality of education provided by Tech. Hopefully these responses are from t-shirt fans (tech has t-shirt fans?) and not actual tech grads. You would think that the title of the site would provide sufficient clues to the level of reality the site operates on (hint: not very) that could be discerned by any 4 (5,6,7?) year college graduate. Sounds like tech knows all about self-delusion, but they have already proven that they can’t find a dictionary or a thesaurus.

  16. Whens was the last time Tech lost to the Faggies?

    This is like Iowa State making fun of University of Texas. Its more funny than insulting.

    McGee got benched. Your team sucks. Leach made a pretty honest statement. A&M didnt like him enough to play him. Injured huh? Then why did he play 2nd team QB? If a bad team benches you…honestly how do you think youll get drafted? Thats whats insane…keep it coming aggots. Your not only making yourselves seem more desperate but your making Tech look better and better. Keep em coming. See you at the Jones…and have fun with your Baylor rivalry again this year.

  17. HAHAHA! Thats rich! I love how these tech tards think they have superiority over A&M because of their TEN years of football tradition!

    Face it tech, Vince Gill is the best thing to happen to that pathetic excuse for a university. And he can’t wait to sail his little pirate ship out of that shit hole. The problem is he’s been at tech, and now everyone knows he’s a joke, including (but not limited too): clemson, auburn, ucla, and washington.

    Granted, you’ve had our number the last several years. Do you honestly think its going to last?? It won’t be long and tech will digress back into not only academic irrelevance but athletic as well.

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